


The Succession of Us

by indecentpause



Series: Holding Our Hearts in Our Hands [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: (More details in the notes), A lot of this story will make more sense if you read Push Me Pull Me First, Bisexual Character, Black Character(s), Black Lead Character, California conversation, College, Disabled Character - Aphasia, F/F, F/M, Iranian Character, It takes place around the same time but with different characters, Meet-Cute, Middle Eastern Character, Romance, Sexism, Slice of Life, happy for now, hfn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 12:34:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 20,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14769726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indecentpause/pseuds/indecentpause
Summary: Iffy Jackson is starting over. She's out of her racist as hell high school and in a diverse college, living the family's dream. Nothing can stop her now.That is, as long as she doesn't let that cute, nonverbal guy named Nate distract her from her studies. He doesn't mean to, honest! But they keep bumping into each other, like it might be fate.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello hello, everyone! If you've come to this story without reading Push Me, Pull Me, I suggest reading that first, as that will make Justin and Brett make a lot more sense. If you don't mind them seeming out of place, though, feel free to start here!
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

_August 2006_

 

Iffy’s parents said college would be different from high school. Better. She’d be able to pick her own classes and people would be more mature and instructors would no longer cater to the lowest common denominator.

Her cousin Jay said that was all bullshit. It was exactly like high school, but bigger, and they didn’t call your parents if you didn’t show in class.

Also, like almost everyone was going to be white at her school, so she could expect casual, low-key racism. But that wasn’t new. This was a pretty liberal part of town, so hopefully it wouldn’t be as bad as her high school.

Jay had had the bigger part right, at least. The building and surrounding lawns and parking lots probably stretched at least a half mile, maybe more. And there Iffy stood, on the sidewalk at the bus stop right outside the parking lot, staring at her map and trying to make sense of it. She turned it this way and that until she had it at the right angle, looked up at the school, and went forward.

She needed to get to the Language Arts building -- at the opposite end of campus, of course -- and she only got turned around twice, ending up at the library both times.

“Well, at least I know where _that_ is,” she mumbled to herself.

Students milled around her, everywhere from their middle teens to middle age, and she only had to get bumped into once before she started moving again.

Her phone vibrated in her pocket, already on silent so she wouldn’t forget when she got into class. She pulled it out and saw “Mom” on the caller ID. She braced herself and answered.

“Hey, Mom.” She tucked her phone between her cheek and her shoulder so she could adjust the map again.

“Hi, Keisha. I just wanted to tell you good luck on your first day at college!”

“Thanks. But I actually can’t really talk right now, I’m kind of lost and --”

She looked up. She was at the library _again_. How did this keep happening?

“Dammit,” she muttered.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Iffy said. “Just talking to myself.”

“Well, you sound busy, so I’ll let you go.”

“Thanks.”

She hung up.

Finally she ended up at the Math building, which was only two away from the Language Arts building, thank God. She turned the map again to make sure she was oriented correctly, and started to her right.

Where she smacked straight into somebody’s chest.

She stumbled back a few steps, her brown eyes darting up as she brushed her long black hair out of her face. It was starting to frizz already, even though she’d only straightened it an hour ago. Fucking heat.

The person -- a very, _very_ tall, at least half-Black man, with a shaved head, an armful of tattoos, and a face full of piercings, maybe her age, maybe a year or two older -- looked down at her and pulled Blackberry out of his pocket, tapping something out quickly before turning the screen in her direction.

_Sorry._

Iffy looked up at him helplessly. Was he Deaf? She knew maybe a handful of signs, none of which could be useful in this situation. They stared at each other for a second before she stumbled out an _ASL_ while shaking her head, hoping that would get her message across.

The man nodded and held up a finger. He typed something else into his phone.

_No problem. I can hear. Just can’t speak._

“Oh!” Iffy said. “Okay. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to smack into you like that. I was distracted by my map.”

_Are you lost? Do you need help finding something?_

Iffy started to shake her head, but she paused. If she turned him down, it would be just her luck that she’d go in the wrong direction again and end up back at the library.

“Yeah, actually,” she finally said. “The Language Arts building?”

_I’ll take you over. My name’s Nate. Yours?_

“Iffy,” she said. He hiked an eyebrow. Well, it _was_ a pretty weird name. “It’s a nickname,” she said. “I don’t…” It wasn’t that she _disliked_ her name. She disliked the way people treated her when they learned her name. Her parents had wanted her to have a Black name to go with her Black skin, and she liked it well enough -- was _proud_ of it, even -- but she’d gone to all the whitest schools since she was old enough to walk, and she had to blend in if she was going to be successful. So when Renee gave her the nickname in middle school, she gladly took it on.

“I don’t really use my legal name much,” she finally said. Nate nodded.

_I’m not a fan of my full name either, hence the shortening to Nate. I get you. LA building’s over this way._

Iffy looked up from the message and he gestured for her to follow.

_I take it you’re new to the school. Are you new to the area, too? Do you need someone to show you around?_

Iffy slowed down so she could read the text on the phone screen. She looked up at him and handed it back. “Yeah,” she said. “I moved into the area about a month back with my best friend. Renee. Um…” She trailed off. Having a verbal conversation with text on a cell phone was tricky, but she didn’t want to be rude and overtake it, either. “We’re from Glendale?” she added, to give him something to respond to. “So Tempe isn’t a big jump, but it’s still a bit of a distance.”

_I know having a conversation like this is kind of tricky while we’re walking. Don’t worry about me. I’m a good listener. :P_

Iffy smiled, glad that he seemed to have a sense of humor about something a lot of people were probably pretty impatient with.

“Well, I hate to disappoint you, but I’m not a very good talker,” she said.

_I think you’re doing okay. But if it’s better, do you want to meet in the Student Union sometime after we’re both done with class today? I could tell you about stuff to do in the area, clubs and things, restaurants, all the best stores, if you’re interested in that._

They paused by a door and a quick glance up confirmed to Iffy that it was the Language Arts building. In the past, Iffy would have turned him down -- she could figure that stuff out herself with a quick google -- but then Renee’s words from that morning echoed in her head. ‘ _Try to meet some people, make some friends. Me and Vi love you but you need to start branching out on your own.’_

She bit her lip. She nodded.

“Okay,” she said. “My last class ends just before 3:00.”

_Student Union at 3:15, then?_

His long fingers curled around the palm-sized cell phone, showing his bright orange nails. With green sparkles? Iffy finally smiled. It was cute. She looked up at his face, his sharp nose and grey eyes. He was smiling at her, too.

“Okay,” she repeated. “3:15.”

Nate grinned and gave her a thumbs up, then signed something she couldn’t understand. And as he walked off, he blew her a kiss, but he was already lost in the crowd by the time she found her voice to ask, “What the hell was _that_?”

* * *

 

_If a guy you just met blows a kiss at you while he walks away, what does that mean?_

Iffy wasn’t sure if Renee could get back to her text right away, but hopefully it would be before she met with Nate.

Class was scheduled to start in a few minutes so she put her phone back in her pocket and pulled out her notebook and textbook. A young woman, maybe in her late 20s walked in, and Iffy looked back at her notebook and started doodling while she waited for the professor.

But the woman didn’t sit down. She grabbed a marker and wrote in the top right corner of the whiteboard, “English 101 Honors, 10A-10:50A.” Then, in big, curly letters, at the top middle, she wrote, “Ms. Baker.”

Iffy’s brow furrowed, then she smiled. All the reviews of her classes online had said Ms. Baker was eccentric and weird, so Iffy had expected a batty old woman. Not someone maybe ten years older than her. She could maybe even be her older sister: Ms. Baker had the same dark brown skin tone, the same sharp facial features, the same skinny angles in her body. Her nails were painted bright metallic blue that flashed under the fluorescent light and her dark brown, almost black hair was pulled back into a curly, coily ponytail.

“All right, everyone!” Ms. Baker said. Her voice was bright and bold and big and exuberant, like this was the best part of her day. She picked up a stack of papers and handed them to Iffy, who was in the front right corner, to start handing back. Iffy took one and passed the rest over her shoulder. She thumbed through her packet as Ms. Baker said, “So, the first thing we’re going to go over is language, because that tends to be the most confusing to people for some reason. Cursing in this class is okay, to make a point. Don’t be excessive. Don’t do it in your papers. Slurs are unacceptable for any reason. I hate censorship, but if you need to use a slur in a paper to make a point, please, that’s the only thing I ask you _do_ censor. If you use one in a paper _uncensored_ it will be given a zero, and if you use one in discussion I will ask you to leave for the day.” She paused, waiting for questions. She held up her hands. “So we’re square with this?”

There was a murmur of agreement and a sea of nods, so she continued.

She went through the syllabus a month at a time, and reminded the class multiple times that they would be given assignment dates in class, that the syllabus was a reminder and a refresher rather than doctrine, and that things might change if the speed of the class warranted it. Iffy smiled. All her teachers in high school had said it would be the exact opposite: rigid and unforgiving. She wasn’t sure if she’d been nervous about college or not, but now that Ms. Baker was reassuring them her way of running the class was reasonable and fair, Iffy _was_ a little more relaxed.

She tucked the syllabus into the back of her notebook, and Ms. Baker started the class.

* * *

 

Nate was on his way to his second class when he saw him: his friend Brett, barely ten feet ahead, making his way down the hall and to the main door. Nate picked up his pace to catch up with him and reached out for Brett’s shoulder to let him know he was there. Brett paused and turned around, and a smile spread across his face when he saw Nate. It quickly turned to a scowl when Nate ruffled his curly brown hair like an older brother, even though he was younger than Brett by two years.

“Nate, don’t! My hair’s already a mess today, I don’t need you making it worse.”

Nate chuckled and signed a quick, _Sorry._

Brett tried to rearrange his hair, but gave up halfway through, leaving a few curls sticking up and out from the top and sides of his head. Nate gently adjusted his shorter friend’s curls, pushing them around until they fell a little flatter.

 _There_ , he signed.

“What?” Brett asked. “I don’t know that one.”

_Fixed?_

Brett shrugged. Nate chuckled and rolled his eyes as he pulled his phone out of his pocket.

 _I fixed it,_ he typed.

“Thanks,” Brett said. He signed it at the same time. Nate could hear just fine, but he knew if Brett spoke with the physical movement of the signs he’d learned it would made them easier to remember. Nate hoped by next summer he wouldn’t need to type anymore.

 _Where are you off to? What are your classes this term?_ Back to the Blackberry again.

“Right now I’m on my way to Cold Readings. I’m taking mostly theatre classes this term. Since I switched majors in my third year almost all of my prereqs are already done.” Brett’s sign was clumsy and he dropped a number of words, but he was improving.

 _You’ve been practicing,_ Nate signed. Brett furrowed his brow. Nate mouthed it out as he signed it again, trying to get it through without using the Blackberry. Brett squinted.

“I’ve been… practicing?” he asked.

Nate grinned and nodded. As they approached the lecture room used for his Lit and Film class, Nate tapped into his phone again.

_This is me. See you later!_

He patted Brett’s shoulder and Brett waved as they parted ways.

Nate plopped down in a seat in front, trying to channel his excitement about seeing Iffy later into his class work. She seemed nice, and she was so pretty, and she seemed pretty smart, if a little shy.

He hadn’t been able to make many friends besides Brett and his housemate Justin since high school, at least, not outside of work where people were required to interact with him. Most hearing people didn’t know ASL and didn’t care enough to learn and most Deaf people didn’t appreciate a hearing guy busting in on their space. He didn’t really belong anywhere.

But Iffy made him feel like Brett and Justin did. Like it was no big deal. Just one of many ways to communicate.

Like he belonged beside her.

* * *

 

It was 3:00 sharp and, after a few second-guesses of _Maybe I shouldn’t go_ , Iffy made her way over to the student union, grabbed a cup of coffee, and picked out a table close to the door in case she needed an exit. Nate didn’t seem dangerous in any way, but she’d learned better than to assume based off only one meeting.

She pulled out her cell phone to see if Renee had responded yet. Nothing. She might have been at work if she was out of class. They lived together, but weren’t always the best at communicating their schedules. Maybe they should get a calendar.

Someone knocked on the back of her chair and she spun around. Nate was there, walking around her to the other side of the table to sit across from her. He waved.

“Hi,” she said.

They fell into silence.

“What was all that…” She waved her hands in the air, trying to mimic the signs he’d flung in her direction earlier. Nate grinned sheepishly and pulled his Blackberry out of his pocket.

_I was saying “see you later” and gave you a name sign._

“A name sign?”

_Yeah. It literally translates to ‘shining butterfly.’_

Iffy raised an eyebrow and laughed incredulously. “Why would you give me a nickname like that?”

_Because you’re really pretty? And your eyes are golden brown, like butterfly wings._

Iffy snorted. “Maybe a moth.”

_Have you seen moths? A lot of them are really beautiful, too._

Iffy chuckled nervously and curled her hand over her cheek, a small attempt at comfort in an unfamiliar situation. Usually when people said things like this, they wanted something, but Nate hadn’t made any indication he wanted anything at all. Still, she was on her guard now.

Nate’s smile turned a little nervous and he tapped out something on his phone, frowned and shook his head, deleted it, and typed in something else.

_Was that out of line? I’m sorry._

Iffy stared at the two sentences for a few moments before sliding it back to Nate. “It’s not that, exactly, it just… it kinda makes me uncomfortable.”

 _Sorry_ , he signed. She only knew a handful of signs, but she did recognize that once.

She signed back, _You’re okay._

Nate grinned brightly.

_Are you learning ASL? What do you know? Not a lot of people know it or are interested in it. I can help you, if you want!_

Iffy’s eyes scanned the Blackberry. It would be easier to answer verbally, but Nate had been so pleasant, even during the uncomfortable parts of their conversation. So she stumbled out, _I know a little, but I’m bad at it. I learned in high school._ She knew she’d dropped a number of signs and her tenses were probably screwed up, but she wanted to try.

Nate nodded and slid the phone back again.

_Didn’t use it, so you lost it?_

“Exactly,” Iffy said.

 _My sister and I learned together_. _It helps to have someone else to practice with._

“Is she mute, too?” Iffy paused and her hand flew to her mouth. “Is that an okay word to use? I don’t want to call you that if it’s offensive.”

Nate shrugged. _It doesn’t bother me. Some people don’t like it, though. But no, my sister can speak. It’s getting her to stop that’s the trick._

Iffy giggled and curled her hand over her mouth to hide it.

“I understand. The same could be said about my roommate. I love her, though.”

_Sister? Friend? Girlfriend?_

Iffy responded without thinking, gruffly, a little sarcastically. “I haven’t had a girlfriend since freshman year of high school.” She sat up straight and slapped her hand over her mouth, eyes wide. Her nostrils flared as she brought in a too-quick breath. Oh God, oh God, how could she let her guard down like that in front of a complete stranger? She knew better.

 _You okay?_ Nate signed slowly.

Iffy just sat, staring, unsure of where to go from here.

Nate typed something into his phone, pausing every now and then to delete or rephrase. Finally, he slid it over, nudging it against her knuckles, tight on the table.

_If it’s the girlfriend thing, don’t worry about it! My best friend Justin is gay and he’s dating one of my other friends who’s bi. I understand being scared, especially in Arizona, but most people around this area don’t care much. And even if this is the only conversation we have, you’re safe with me while we’re having it._

Iffy lowered her hand and her breath steadied. She smiled. “Thanks, Nate.”

Nate took the phone back and scrolled down, then pushed it back with a questioning tilt of his head. Iffy looked back down again. There were two more sentences she’d missed.

_Although I hope we can have more conversations after this? You seem really cool._

Iffy smirked and chuckled. “It seems my plan to trick people into thinking I’m cool is working, then.”

Nate laughed. Iffy jumped at the sound -- she’d thought he had no voice at all -- but it was bright and happy and wonderful.

“Oh, and, uh, to wrap up the previous conversation,” Iffy said. “I’m bi. Just to make that clear.”

Nate grinned and gave her a thumbs up. She gave a hesitant one back.

* * *

 

“Iffy face! I’m home!”

Iffy was at her desk when the shout came through the apartment and the door in the front room crashed shut. She looked up from her homework toward the open door, but it was at such an angle that she couldn’t see the living room.

“Me too!” she called back.

Renee’s familiar, chubby face popped into the door from the side of the frame, her fingers curled around the edge, “Hello,” she said, drawling it out into three syllables instead of two. Her bright, fire engine red hair was falling out of her clip and into her eyes. She blew a strand away. It fell right back into place. “How was your first day at college?” she asked.

Iffy pushed her chair away from the desk with her feet and rolled over to the bed, patting the blankets and gesturing for Renee to come in and sit down.

“It was fine. I might have even made a friend like you told me to.”

Renee grinned. “Yeah? Who?” She skipped into the room and plopped down on the bed beside her friend, sprawling out over the sheets. Iffy peered out of the bedroom door again.

“Is Vi here?”

“Nah,” Renee said. “She has mosque tonight.”

“On a Monday?”

“They’re hosting some educational speakers or something for the next few weeks.”

Iffy hummed in acknowledgement and nodded. Renee gently slapped her knee and said, “So, tell me about this person you met! Are they cute?”

“Yes, but --” Iffy said it before she could stop herself. Renee’s eyes lit up and Iffy groaned. Renee was _always_ trying to set her up on dates, apparently now even with people she’d never even met.

“Really?”

“ _But_ ,” Iffy said, “that’s beside the point.”

“Aw,” Renee pouted.

“He started school here last year, but he’s been living here for two. He told me about some of the stuff to do around here, and he’s taking me to his friend’s coffee shop on Thursday. Apparently they’re the best in town.”

“Better than The Tree House?”

“I guess we’ll see,” Iffy chuckled.

“Does his friend own it?”

“No, I mean… he’s like, in management I think. Lead barista or something like that. I just meant the place he works. It’s just faster to say.”

“True.” Renee pursed her lips and nodded. “And what does he do? This guy?”

“His name’s Nate, by the way,” Iffy said. “So you have something to call him.”

“Excellent. I’ll begin the fanfics tonight.”

“ _Renee_.” Iffy snorted a laugh.

Renee grinned and gently knuckled Iffy’s knee. “Anyway, seriously,” she said. “So tell me about this dude.”

“He’s in management at a record store. A little independent one in downtown Tempe. Nightshade Records, I think he called it?”

“Spooky.” Renee waggled her fingers at Iffy in poor imitation of a ghost. “So, day one of college and you’re already going on a date with a cute guy with a good job! Was not expecting that much from you. But you’ve always been an overachiever.”

“It’s not --” Iffy huffed.

“You sure?”

“ _Yes_.”

Renee sighed over-dramatically and rolled her eyes. “Fine,” she said. “For the record, I think you should go out on dates a little more often. Just because you go on a date doesn’t mean you have to get married.”

“I think for now I’ll just stick with hanging out with friends,” Iffy said.

Renee grinned. “As long as that includes me, I guess that’s pretty cool, too.”

“Of course it includes you, you big dork,” Iffy laughed. She nudged her knee against Renee’s leg, hanging off the bed. “Come on, I’m starving. I haven’t eaten lunch yet. Let’s go see what’s in the kitchen.”

* * *

 

Nate practically _danced_ through the door when he got home. His roommate and best friend, Justin, stood in the kitchen, sipping on a mug of coffee and leaning against the granite counter. He looked up at the sound of the door closing and smiled tiredly when he saw Nate.

“Hey, man.” He looked the taller man up and down. He raised a thick, brown eyebrow and said, “Good day or what?”

 _Excellent day_ , Nate signed.

Justin put down the coffee so he could sign along with his speech. He knew Nate didn’t need it, but he felt it was a sign of respect for his friend.

“What’s up?”

_I met someone really cool!_

“Like, ‘Let’s be bffs’ cool or ‘I wanna date you’ cool?”

 _Both?_ Nate signed. He chuckled. _But don’t worry, I’m not going to replace you._

“I wasn’t,” Justin laughed. “You’re good. What’s she like? I assume she if it’s someone you’d want to date?”

 _You assume right_ , Nate signed. He paused and leaned against the opposite wall, then stood straight again so he could get better movement in his arms. _She’s short, Black, long black hair, amazing golden brown eyes. Kind of angular and… pointy, I guess? She was lost and I helped her find where she was going and we met after class so I could tell her about stuff to do. Turns out she’s not just adorable, she’s an adorable nerd. I’m bringing her to your place on Thursday. Do you work then?_

Justin took a sip of his coffee and gave Nate a thumbs up and a half nod.

 _Awesome_ , Nate grinned. _That’ll be even better._

* * *

 

The next day, Iffy’s classes started an hour later, but she was up at the same time. She turned her phone alarm off and frowned. She’d forgotten to reset it for Tuesdays and Thursdays. She’d have to remember to do it once she was properly awake. The hems of her too-long yoga pants bunched up under her feet when she shuffled out of her room, and the old basketball jersey Renee had never given back to her ex-boyfriend served as a great pajama top. It was much too big for someone so tiny, but it was comfortable, and Renee probably wouldn’t even notice if she accidentally flashed some chest through the sleeve. She pulled her nighttime hair scarf off and draped it over a chair as she made her way into the kitchen.

She had to pull that chair in to get to the top shelf where the coffee was.

“Damn, Renee, rude, putting something I need so early so high up,” she mumbled. Its new place would be right next to the coffee maker.

The coffee tin was too light. Iffy shook it. The rattle of coffee bean crumbs answered her. She popped off the lid, and, as she’d expected, it was nearly empty. Nowhere near enough to make even a single cup, much less a pot.

She sighed and rubbed her eyes, climbing down from the chair and throwing the coffee can in the garbage. She pushed the chair haphazardly back into the dining room, leaving it against the wall.

“Coffee shops, coffee shops,” she muttered to herself. The Tree House was in the opposite direction of her school. Even being up early, she wouldn’t have time to bus there and back. There was coffee in the student union. The cup she’d gotten yesterday wasn’t bad.

“I’ll go there early,” she said under her breath, and went back to the bedroom to get ready.

First things were always first, though: she had to take care of her hair. If it was just curly and coily like Ms. Baker’s, it wouldn’t be so bad, and maybe she’d even go natural. But it was curly and coily _and_ frizzy, and on her worst days -- today of which seemed to be one, she thought, upon looking in the mirror -- it almost stuck straight out at the sides. Her cousin Genni had the same hair, and had the facial features to rock it. Iffy, however, felt she did not, so she straightened her hair as often as she could while still keeping its health intact. Instructors and students tended to take her more seriously when it fell straight. People were also less likely to try to touch it, and with the exception of _very_ close friends and family, Iffy _despised_ being touched.

She stuck her head in the sink and gave it a quick shampoo, then combed the straightening cream through. After she got dressed, she plopped down at her computer and logged into her IM to kill some time while she waited for it to dry.

The twins were both online. She sent the same message to both of them.

**Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Hey guys, group chat?

_UGotPorn has joined your chat._

**Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Hey, GerBear!

 **UGotPorn** : Yo! Hey, friend, how are you?

_SexyEwok22 has joined your chat._

**UGotPorn** : And here comes D, whoo!

 **SexyEwok22** : *bows* thank you thank you

 **SexyEwok22** : so what are you up to, iffy?

 **SexyEwok22** : were just sitting across the room from each other playing WoW

 **UGotPorn** : As usual.

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Not much! Just waiting for my hair to dry and straighten.

 **UGotPorn** : Iffy, you gotta go for dreadlocks. They’re the best, for real. There’s some maintenance but it’s nothing like the crap you have to go through right now.

 **SexyEwok22** : no girl rock the afro like god intended!

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : You guys, I’m a teacher. I know it’s just classes at the community center but they expect me to look a certain way.

 **UGotPorn** : You mean code for “not Black,” right? Gross.

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : I know, but other than that I really like it, and it pays well. I’ve been straightening my hair since middle school anyway.

 **SexyEwok22** : you thought about getting it professionally done, then? save you some time

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : With chemical straighteners? Fuck that, I’m not putting formaldehyde in my hair.

 **Bobette-The_Lizard_Queen** : The daily creams take longer but at least it doesn’t cause breakage.

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : But we’ve had versions of this talk over and over, let’s just not do this right now, okay? Renee made the last of the coffee and didn’t replace it so I haven’t had any caffeine yet.

 **UGotPorn** : What! What a jerk.

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Yeah. I’m going to pick up a cup at school. Maybe two. Or three.

 **UGotPorn** : Just get eight shots and have it all in one go!

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Don’t tempt me. I’ll do it.

 

Iffy gently ran her fingers over her hair to test it. Still a little damp, but just barely. She’d be okay to brush it and go outside.

 

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Speaking of which, my hair’s mostly dry, so I’m out. Coffee time for me! Thank god.

 **UGotPorn** : Godspeed, my friend!

 **SexyEwok22** : don’t get too much and make yourself sick ok

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : I’ll be fine, D. Thanks, though.

 

She logged off and put her computer to sleep, then grabbed her backpack and her brush so she could finish her hair while she was waiting for the bus, double-checked that she had the right books, and went out the door.


	2. Chapter 2

The student union was quieter than Iffy thought it would be at 9:30. Where yesterday all of the echoes of talking students bounced around the walls and people were rushing back and forth all over, today it was mostly still. There were a lot of people sitting at various tables studying. Iffy didn’t blame them. The perfect silence of the library would almost be too loud to be able to get anything done.

She ordered a cup of coffee -- “Eight shot iced Americano, fill the remainder up with coffee instead of water?” -- and the barista handed it to her with a disbelieving shake of her head.

“You know where the school first aid is, right?” she laughed.

Iffy chuckled. “I’m sure I’ll be fine.” She turned around to find a place to sit and enjoy her coffee, and in the corner she saw a familiar shaved head and tattoo on the back of his neck.

“Nate?” she whispered. They both went here, yes, but it was such a _big_ school, she hadn’t expected to bump into him like this.

If they were going out on Thursday, she was already committed to seeing him again. Why not go over and say hi? If he was busy, she’d just sit somewhere else.

His back was to her, and for a moment, she forgot he could hear, and she gently tapped his shoulder while she leaned into view. Nate looked up and grinned when he saw her, gesturing to the seat across from him. Iffy smiled and nodded, and sat. She took a sip of her coffee. She didn’t speak.

 _Don’t forget, I can hear_.

Iffy could almost hear the teasing tone in the text on the phone screen. She laughed and scratched her neck, nervous and embarrassed.

“Sorry,” she said. “I’m just used to… well, you know, I’m sure.”

He nodded sagely and crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned back in the chair. He lifted his feet and the chair legs thumped back onto the ground.

_You’re here for classes, I assume? What do you have today?_

“A science course and Spanish 1-2,” she said. “You?”

_Also a science course, actually. And a creative writing class. Just two today for me, too._

“Just two?” Iffy asked.

_I take four MWF. I’m trying to finish early._

“Makes sense,” Iffy said. “If you can handle the load, why not, right? But it sounds pretty intense.”

_It’s mostly stuff I like, so it’s going to be enjoyable even if it’s a lot of work. I hope. :P_

Iffy chuckled at the emoticon and slid the tablet back. She took another sip of her coffee. Strong, bitter, just a pinch of sugar. Perfect for a morning cup. Lattes and things were for the afternoon: in the morning, she wanted it ice cold and strong enough to peel the ugly eggshell blue paint off the student union walls.

Nate pointed to her coffee and tilted his head to the side. He made a sort of shrugging motion that Iffy assumed meant something like “What is that?”

“Eight shot Americano,” she said. “Drip coffee instead of water.”

Nate laughed.

_And you say I’m intense??_

The double question marks made Iffy laugh, and she nodded. “So what are you going to school for?”

_Creative writing. I wanted to do spoken word professionally before I had the accident, but there isn’t much call for slam poets who sign. What are you studying?_

It was phrased so casually Iffy almost wasn’t surprised. Almost. “I haven’t declared a major yet,” she said. “I’m taking a bunch of pre-reqs. I don’t know what I want to do, but I was offered a scholarship, so, here I am. Well.” She shrugged. “I’d like to be a professional dancer. But there isn’t much call for that, either.” She paused. Nate had taken his phone back, but wasn’t typing yet. His eyes were on her as he listened, waiting until she was finished to continue.

Iffy wasn’t sure how to ask, but if he wasn’t comfortable talking about it, he wouldn’t have brought it up, right? So she said, “What do you mean, ‘accident?’”

Nate pursed his lips and stroked his chin as he thought about his reply. Iffy wasn’t quite sure whether he was offended, and she was almost about to say, ‘Never mind’ when Nate started typing. His thumbs flew across the keyboard with a dexterity Iffy had rarely seen. His nails were bright green with blue sparkles today, painted perfectly, with no streaks or chips or clumps, like a lot of men who painted their nails.

_I was 17. I was backstage for a school play helping the actors with their costume changes and someone had left a faux-silk piece on the floor. I slipped and smashed my head really bad. I was blind for three days and lost all my language skills. I was able to re-learn how to read and write but the speech never came back. They said they didn’t think I’d even be able to learn sign, but here I am. Maybe one day I’ll fall again and turn it back on. But I’m not counting on it. This isn’t an inspirational movie and that’s not how brains work._

Iffy’s hand reflexively went to her mouth and she whispered, “Oh my god.” Nate frowned and his brow furrowed. He signed something, and Iffy realized she was still holding the phone. She handed it back.

_Don’t. Don’t feel sorry for me or whatever it is you’re doing. Please. It is what it is and it sucked at first but I’m used to it now. Sometimes people are dicks but overall I get along fine._

“Sorry,” Iffy whispered. “It’s just… I don’t know, it’s hard to hear something like that and not be surprised? Obviously it was way, _way_ harder for you to have to deal with but… shit, I’ve totally put my foot in my mouth. I’m just going to apologize one more time and then stop talking. Sorry.”

Nate waved his hands in front of his face and shook his head. He made a soft, distressed sound and started typing furiously on his tablet again.

_No, no, it’s okay._

Iffy’s fingers tightened on the cold coffee cup. The condensation wet her fingertips and the inner joints of her knuckles. She nodded, but didn’t speak. What could she say that wouldn’t end up being stupid at best, offensive at worst?

Nate frowned and looked down at the phone on the table in front of him, one hand on either side gripping to the table. Iffy’s eyes were locked on them, avoiding his face. But then he lifted them and they started to move. Iffy only recognized “ASL” and maybe “learn” and maybe something about a pencil? But that wouldn’t make any sense.

“I only caught a little of that,” she said. She signed the word ‘little’ as she said it, but didn’t know any of the other words.

Nate tapped away at his tablet again, then slid it over to Iffy. She wiped her hand off on her jeans and pulled it closer.

_Are you still interested in me teaching you a little ASL? If you are, say yes, and read on!_

Iffy chuckled and looked up. “Yeah, I am,” she said. Nate gave her a thumbs up and gestured back to the phone.

_ASL is different from Signed English. It has its own grammatical structure using gestures and facial expressions to make signs. Where signed English is literal, ASL is its own language that you would have to translate to and from._

Iffy nodded. “I do remember that,” she mumbled, mostly to herself.

 _And I use ASL,_ Nate signed. Iffy managed to catch enough of it to understand what he meant.

“So I’ll basically be learning an entirely new language?” Iffy asked.

Nate nodded. He didn’t let his encouraging smile falter, even though he knew what to expect: _Sorry, I like you, but that’s too much work_.

Iffy rubbed her hands together and pushed her coffee to the side. “Well, then, we’d better get going,” she said. Nate’s eyes darted back up from the table to meet hers, bright and beaming with no hint of mocking or ill intent. “I’ve got forty-five minutes until my next class starts. That’s enough for the alphabet, right?”

* * *

 

_Let me walk you to your next class?_

Iffy grinned and stood as she returned Nate’s phone.

 _OK_ , she signed. It was a little slow and a little sloppy, but it was right, and she was trying, and that was the important thing. “It’s this way,” she said, nodding towards the door to on the east side. “In the sciences building.”

 _Me too,_ Nate signed.

 _What is?_ Iffy signed. Nate spelled it out, slowly, so she could catch every letter. She repeated the double ‘o’ at the end.

“So if it’s two of the same letter in a row you bounce your hand to the side?”

Nate nodded.

Iffy grinned. “Is it rude if I say that’s cute?”

Nate laughed and waved her concerns away. She looked up at the doors as they passed and pulled her class schedule out of her pocket. “I’m in 11-A,” she said.

Nate paused.

_What?_

“Room…” She trailed off and signed, _11-A_. “11-A?” she repeated, in case she had signed it wrong.

Nate pulled his phone out and typed, _No you’re not!_

“Uh, yeah I am?” Iffy said. She shoved her class schedule up into his face. “Don’t tell me where I have class. I might not know how to get there but I know where I’m supposed to be.”

_No, I just mean, that’s my class, too!_

Iffy’s eyes went wide at the words on the screen in her hands. She looked up at Nate. “Really? Chem 101? With Professor Ackley?”

Nate grinned and nodded exuberantly.

“That’s crazy!” Iffy laughed. It quieted into a chuckle and she shook her head. “I can’t believe it.”

Nate tapped her shoulder and she looked up from her feet as they approached the classroom. _What?_ Nate signed, and then something having to do with what Iffy guessed meant ‘loud’.

“I can’t believe it,” she repeated, a little louder, so Nate could hear her over the chatter of the students echoing in the halls. Nate opened the door and gestured for her to go in first with a bow. Iffy laughed, bowing back and entering. He followed.

They sat beside each other in the middle of the classroom. Rather than desks, the seats were divided into two-person tables.

_I assume if we sit together, we’re going to be assigned as lab partners._

Iffy smiled, a little less brash than she had been. Gentle. Shy.

“Yeah,” she said softly. “Guess so.”

 _Giving you a chance to move now!_ Nate joked.

Iffy shook her head. “No,” she said. “I like it here.”

* * *

 

Nate’s classes were split on Tuesdays and Thursdays, one in the morning, one later in the afternoon, so he went home between them to eat and work on homework, since he didn’t live too far. Iffy, on the other hand, had absolutely nothing to do but write an essay and read some chapters, and that would be much easier to do in the comfort of her own bedroom.

When she entered the apartment, the soft playing of an electric guitar lilted out into the living room.

“Renee?” Iffy called. The music stopped, but Renee didn’t enter the living room. Vi did. Her purple hijab was off, as it always was when she was only going to be around family or close female friends, her short black hair in a bob around her tawny brown face. A bright white grin graced it and she said, “Iffy! How the heck are you?”

“I’m good!”

Vi launched herself at Iffy and into a hug, knocking her back a few steps. She kissed both of her shorter friend’s cheeks as Renee entered with her guitar hanging from the strap around her shoulders.

“S’how’s Nate?” Renee sing-songed.

“He’s _fine_ ,” Iffy sing-songed back. She wasn’t going to let herself get annoyed. Even if her best friend _was_ mentally setting her up with a guy she’d never even met. She’d had a great day and nothing was going to spoil it.

“I’ll bet,” Vi said. “I don’t know much about what makes a guy sexy, but Renee makes it sound like you’re super into him.”

“ _What?_ ” Iffy squawked. “I met him yesterday! Sure, he’s nice and everything --”

“And cute,” Renee stage-whispered.

“What would you know? You’ve never met him!”

“I know what you’ve told me, and I know the look on your face when you talk about someone you think is cute.”

“Okay, fine, he’s cute,” Iffy snapped. _Don’t get mad, don’t get mad_ , she told herself.

“And you’re going on a date.”

“It’s not a date!” Iffy had to fight to keep from yelling indignantly. She wasn’t _mad_ , really, just… ugh! Renee was so frustrating! Iffy clenched her hands into fists, unclenched them again, and when a sharp pain shot up her temple she loosened her tight jaw. She looked down.

“Renee, come on. You know how I feel about this kind of stuff.”

“Sorry. I’ll drop it.”

Vi took a step to the side, but left her arm draped around Iffy’s shoulders as Renee pulled Iffy into a hug.

“You sure _he_ doesn’t think it’s a date, though?” she said gently. Iffy was about to say no, but something caught it before it came out, and she shrugged nervously. She hadn’t considered that. She’d only considered that her best friend was picking on her again.

“Did you say it wasn’t?” Renee asked next. “Like, did you clarify?”

Iffy shook her head and tensed under Vi and Renee’s arms. “You think I should have to?”

“I don’t think you _should_ have to,” Renee said. “But depending on what he does while you’re out, you might need to anyway.”

Iffy took a step back and both Renee and Vi let their arms fall away. She curled her arms around herself, loosely gripping her sleeves between her fingers and thumbs.

“Just be careful,” Vi said. “It’ll probably be fine. Just… you know how stupid men can be.”

“Text us when you get there and let us know if you need a ride home,” Renee added. “I have the day off.”

Iffy nodded. “Yeah,” she whispered.

Suddenly, she wasn’t sure if she should go on Thursday, anymore.

* * *

 

“Nate!”

Nate poked his head out of his bedroom when Justin called his name as he walked in the door. Justin’s steps were heavy and his eyes ringed with dark circles, his shoulders slumped and his hair disheveled. Nate stepped out of his room and signed, _Are you okay, man?_

Justin dropped his backpack by the door and kicked off his shoes. It was only just past 9:00, but he’d been up since 3:00 AM, then worked a double.

“Tired,” Justin said. “You?”

_Fine. Remember Iffy?_

“The woman you told me about yesterday, right?”

_Yeah. She’s in my lab!_

“No!” Justin laughed.

_Yes! So as long as I don’t fuck anything up, I’ll have a lot of chances to talk to her and get to know her better._

“Nice!” Justin grinned. “Just don’t try to push anything too fast. I get that you’re really into her, but the way you talked about your interaction yesterday made her seem kind of hesitant. And, you know, you have to prepare for the possibility she might not want to date you back.”

 _I know, I know_. Nate sighed and shrugged. _Even if she doesn’t, though, she’s really cool. She’s learning ASL! I’m going to teach her. She asked me to and everything!_

“That’s so cool!” Justin grinned. “Even Brett didn’t do that right away. It took him a couple years to start learning. He’s finally getting it now, though.”

 _How is he_? Nate asked. _He seemed really tired when I ran into him yesterday. Are you guys having late night rendezvous that I don’t know about?_

“I wish,” Justin sighed. “It would be a lot better for both of us. No, he’s still not totally recovered from that crazy flu thing he caught when we came back from California last month.”

Nate frowned sympathetically. _Sucks_ , he signed.

“Yeah,” Justin said. His voice was soft and sad. “I haven’t seen him much since we got back. He’s been mostly keeping to himself.”

Nate’s brow drew down to join his mouth. If he ran into Brett at school again, he’d talk to him about it.

* * *

 

 _Wednesday. The slowest day of the week,_ Iffy thought as she waited for the bus to get to school. She didn’t have her headphones on for once, enjoying the birdsong of early August and the hot breeze on her face. It would be the perfect weather for a skirt, if she ever wore them, but she’d never wear anything but jeans or slacks. She was so thin and flat and angular, she just didn’t feel like she belonged in a skirt or a dress, or even long shorts. They were never cut to fit bodies like hers.

She hummed softly to herself, rocking back and forth slightly as she tapped her feet to the beat in her head.

“Hey there! Do you need a ride? I was just coming out of the grocery store and saw you.”

Iffy tensed, immediately on guard. Her shoulders and hands tightened, she stilled completely, and she turned toward the man’s voice.

He wasn’t carrying any grocery bags.

“No, I’m okay,” she said. “I’m cool with the bus. Thanks, though.”

 _Please let that be it_ , she thought.

He sat down on the bench beside her. She glanced in every direction she could without obviously looking around. The place was empty. It was so early. There were cars, but no pedestrians, nobody at the bus stop across the street.

“Why are you taking the bus?” the man asked. “Won’t your boyfriend give you a ride?”

 _He’s fucking fishing,_ she thought. Her next line was, no, I don’t have a boyfriend, and it would give him an opening. So she said,

“His car’s in the shop. Something wrong with the transmission. I’m going to meet him now, actually.”

“That’s too bad.”

Iffy’s shoulders tensed even more. “Why’s that?” she asked. She tried to keep her voice light. Conversational. _Don’t make him angry. You’re alone and Renee’s not expecting to see you again until tonight._

“I would’ve liked to take you out to brunch if you weren’t going anywhere.”

 _I’m waiting for the bus. Of course I’m going somewhere._ “I’m on my way to school, actually,” she said. “On an academic scholarship. That’s where we’re meeting. So, you know, attendance is important.”

“But not _that_ important, right?” His voice was lighthearted but his face was tense, and Iffy could tell he was only going to let her reject him so many more times before he started getting in her face.

The heavy squeal of brakes sounded down the road and Iffy leaned forward. The bus was coming.

“I have to go,” she said quickly. She stood to walk to the curb to make sure the driver saw her and stopped. He caught her forearm. His hand was big and sweaty and his grip was too tight.

“Don’t I at least get a hug?” he asked.

The bus pulled up. Iffy jerked her arm away and took a few steps toward it.

“No,” she said simply.

Never before had the two seconds it took for the bus doors to open passed so slowly. The man stood, the doors opened, and Iffy ran on and said to the bus driver, “Just me, the other guy has a car.”

The doors started to close as he followed her. His face was no longer calm. It was all twisted up, angry, and he shouted, “You stupid --”

The bus driver closed the door in his face. Iffy looked up from her wallet for the first time as she scanned her pass. She flinched when the man banged on the door.

“Do you know him?” the bus driver asked. Iffy’s eyes caught hers. She was maybe just a few inches taller than her, not quite as thin but still small.

“No.” Iffy cursed herself for letting her voice shake. She should be used to this by now. It had been happening since she was fourteen. But it still shook her up any time they touched her or tried to follow her.

“And you said he has a car?”

“That’s what he said.”

“Well, then we don’t have to let him on, do we?” the driver said. She pulled the bus out of park and went on their way. Iffy finally smiled, relieved, and she looked back at the bus. It was mostly empty, as it was the end of the line, but it would fill up fast at this time on the way to the school.

“Um,” she said. The bus driver glanced up at her in the rearview mirror.

“Mm?”

“Is it okay if I just hang out up here with you?”

The bus driver smiled and said, “Us ladies gotta stick together, right?”

Iffy smiled and pulled out her headphones, slipping them on over her ears. She didn’t turn her music on so she could still hear what was going on around her.

All morning, she jumped whenever someone bumped into her or someone she wasn’t expecting appeared in her line of vision. She mostly kept her eyes on her feet, not wanting to encourage anyone to talk to her by making eye contact.

* * *

 

Ms. Baker had a way of calming people down without even trying. Her presence was soothing to Iffy: strong, practical, down-to-earth. After ten minutes of being in her class, most of the tension finally fled from Iffy’s back, even though her shoulders and arms were still a little tense, and she still eyed everyone around her a bit warily. When Ms. Baker dropped a stack of papers on her desk to start passing back, she jumped. Ms. Baker paused, and glanced at Iffy just for a moment, with a look that said, _see me after class_.

Well, shit.

Iffy hung around after the class was dismissed, pretending to organize her notebook so nobody would think Ms. Baker had hinted she should stay behind. She didn’t want people to assume she needed help already. It was only the third day of school. The second day of this class!

When the other students had cleared out, Ms. Baker sat down in the seat beside Iffy and said, “It’s Keisha, correct?”

“I prefer Iffy, if you don’t mind.”

“All right,” she said. “May I ask why?”

Iffy shrugged. “I’ve just been going by it since middle school. I’m used to it.”

Ms. Baker nodded. “Fair enough. Iffy. Are you all right? You seemed pretty upset when you got here and you were a lot tenser all day than you were last class.”

Iffy looked down at the papers on her desk that hadn’t quite gotten into her folder. She picked them up and knocked them against the table to straighten them, even though they were already fine.

“Just some street harassment on my way here,” she finally said vaguely.

Ms. Baker’s brow pulled in and she frowned. “Will you be okay to get home?”

“I should be,” Iffy said. “I still have one more class. He’s probably long gone.”

“What do you mean?”

Iffy looked back down at her papers and folder. “He cornered me at the bus stop.”

“Did you recognize him? Do you know if he lives in your area?”

Iffy shrugged noncommittally. “I’d never seen him before. He said he was grocery shopping, but I don’t know if that was bullshit.” Her head shot up to her instructor and she bit her lip.

“I mean --”

Ms. Baker cracked a smile. She laughed. “It’s okay. It’s accurate, right?”

Iffy finally smiled. Ms. Baker gently touched her forearm and said, “So you’ll be okay, then?”

Iffy nodded, a little surer. “I’ll be fine,” she said. “Thank you.”

* * *

 

The campus for this university was so _big_. Jay had really been serious when he used that word to describe college. The walk from the English classroom back to the student union was almost five minutes, even at Iffy’s brisk step. She kept her eyes on everyone’s ankles and knees, keeping her head up enough to seem confident and just distracted without having to make eye contact. Her phone went off in her pocket, and she pulled it out to read the text from Renee.

_Vi and I are going for Mexican for dinner. Want me to bring you anything?_

Iffy stepped to the side so she could respond, and halfway to the edge of the sidewalk, someone smacked straight into her so hard she stumbled backward. She lost her balance and crashed to the sidewalk, groaning softly when her bones hit the concrete. She drew her knees in protectively, shit, shit, this was it, this was the guy that was going to abduct her and the last conversation she’d have on the outside would be about Mexican food.

But then he -- and it was a man, tall, thin, with messy curls and tired eyes -- dropped down to his knees to help her gather her things, stammering soft apologies. Iffy shifted to kneel so she could pick up her books and folders, and as they both stood, the man handed her things back. She frowned and opened her mouth to… to she didn’t _know_ what, but she was so done, she was done being scared, she was done letting people walk all over her, she was done with --

“I’m so sorry,” he said again, and his voice was so soft and tired and sincere. “I’m really sorry. It was completely my fault. I wasn’t paying attention. Are you okay?”

Iffy eyed him closely for a moment. He was in terrible condition. His shoulders were slouched low and his eyes were ringed in dark circles, and he was probably the thinnest person Iffy had ever seen outside of her old dance studio. She relaxed a little. It had been an accident. She was just still wound up because of what happened this morning. Iffy prided herself on being able to read people, and this guy didn’t want to hurt her. He probably couldn’t have even if he _did_ want to.

Her eyes darted over his face, and she said, “Are _you_ okay?”

He started to say “Yes,” but before he could get it out, his feet stumbled underneath him and he wobbled to the side. Not drunk. Exhausted. Sick, maybe. She took her books back from him.

“I think... do you need to sit down? I can walk you somewhere.”

“I was just on my way home from class,” he said. His words were a little slurred. His face was somehow both pale and flushed. He gestured vaguely toward the parking lot. Did this guy think he was going to drive somewhere? No way. Not on Iffy’s watch. She didn’t know him, but it didn’t matter. She wasn’t about to let him put himself or anyone else in danger.

“Drive or bus?” she asked, just in case.

“Drive.”

“No.” Iffy shook her head and shifted her books over to her left arm. She put her hand on his forearm, an echo of Ms. Baker’s earlier touch. “You can’t even walk in a straight line. You’re definitely not okay to drive. Is there someone you can call? I’ll wait in the student union with you if you want.” She had an hour. Even if he was a little clumsy, this guy had been nothing but pleasant, and he didn’t seem particularly talkative, anyway.

“I don’t have anywhere to be right now,” she repeated. “My next class isn’t for an hour. Come on. Come sit down with me.”

The man smiled, small, tentative, and Iffy gave a small smile back. He chuckled softly.

“I didn’t know people like you existed,” he said.

Iffy raised an eyebrow. What the hell was that supposed to mean? “Excuse me?”

“I just mean there aren’t a lot of people who would take time out of their day to help some idiot who ran them down on the sidewalk.”

Iffy laughed, a real, honest laugh, and it felt so good after all the tension she’d carried around with her all day. “I don’t know if I’d call you an idiot. Careless, maybe. But it’s not the same thing.”

“I’m Brett.” His smile widened, just slightly.

“Iffy. Come on, let’s see if we can find you a ride home.”

Iffy didn’t speak much as they walked together. Brett seemed nice enough, and he hadn’t done anything but make a clumsy mistake, but Iffy still couldn’t help but wait for the drop, the moment he would suddenly start to get angry or violent. But it never came. He stumbled a few times and she caught him and helped him to right himself again, and when they got to the student union, she guided him to an empty table and helped him into a chair. The poor guy could barely stay on his feet.

“Is there someone you can call?” she asked. She sat down across from him. Brett’s eyebrows drew together in thought.

They sat in silence for a few moments, then he fumbled his phone out of his pocket and sent someone a text.

“Maybe,” he said.

Iffy watched him as his fingers moved across the keypad, analyzing, sharp, looking for any ulterior motive. There still didn’t seem to be one. She finally started to relax as he texted, his phone pinging with a new message every minute or so. Eventually, he put his phone down on the table and brushed his hair out of his face as he whispered to himself, “Thank you, Nate.”

Iffy’s expression changed. Nervous. Confused. Nate? No way. It couldn’t be! But it wasn’t exactly a common name…

“Did…” Her voice was soft. “Did you just say Nate?”

“Yeah?” Brett’s reply was as unsure as her question. He glanced down at the phone, then back at her again, as if he was expecting her to throw it across the room. Did she really seem that jumpy? “He’s a friend of mine,” Brett elaborated. “He can’t speak, so we have to text.”

Iffy’s eyes widened. “As in… Nate _Paine_?” she asked. She’d seen his name on the sign in sheet for their science class, but there was so way he could be the same one, right?

Brett raised an eyebrow. “You know him?”

A disbelieving smile crossed Iffy’s face and she buried her face in her hand. She chuckled to herself and shook her head. Bumping into him three times in as many days? These coincidences were getting ridiculous. If they were seeing each other elsewhere, Iffy might be worried, but since it was always at school, and generally someone else approached him -- whether it was her in yesterday’s case or Brett in today’s -- instead, it was just funny.

“Yeah,” she finally said. She looked back up again. “We’ve… we’ve met.”

“I…” Brett trailed off, his eyes darting over her face, maybe a little nervous, as if suddenly he thought he should have maybe called someone else. “Is that a bad thing?” he finally asked.

Iffy shook her head. “No, no,” she chuckled. “It’s just… we met on Monday and since then we keep running into each other. We planned to meet tomorrow, anyway, but everything in between has been an accident. It’s just weird and kind of funny.” She chuckled and shook her head again, relaxing in her seat and slumping back a little. “Tomorrow we’re meeting after class to go to a coffee shop where his friend works? My roommate and I are new in the area and we’re trying to figure out good places to go, and coffee is, like, my life force.”

“His friend Justin?” Brett asked. His smile was wide, if a little disbelieving.

“Yeah!” Of all the people in the school who could have bowled her over, how likely was it to have been someone Iffy would be connected to like this without even knowing it? What kind of coincidence _was_ that? “My roommate’s vegetarian, so, you know, Nate said he was vegetarian too, and then he said Justin’s vegan. So they can help us navigate and find good places to go.”

“I’m a vegetarian too, actually,” Brett said. “My favorite place is Pita Jungle. Justin and I go there all the time. You should check it out.”

“Yeah? Okay, I’ll mention it to her tonight.”

They made small talk about restaurants and coffee shops and friends and roommates for a while. Nate arrived shortly after Brett’s last text, gently whacking Brett on the shoulder, but Brett was so tired and surprised he lurched forward and nearly hit the table. Brett righted himself and looked up, smiling when he saw his friend. Nate signed something Iffy recognized as _Hello_. The second half was probably Brett’s name sign.

Iffy hadn’t really seen Nate in any mood but a good one, but today he was _beaming_. He pulled out his phone.

_We just keep running into each other! It must be meant to be!_

Iffy chuckled and offered a noncommittal shrug. Was that why he was in such a good mood?

“I guess so!” she finally said. It was a little late and a little awkward, but nobody seemed to notice.

The three of them made small talk for a while, and Brett put his head down about halfway through the conversation. Iffy raised an eyebrow and Nate typed,

_Let him be. He’s been really sick recently. I’ll make sure he gets home._

Iffy looked back over at Brett and gently nudged his ankle with her foot. He sat up, squinting over at Nate, who was typing on his phone.

“That was me,” Iffy said. “You guys get going. Brett, it’s pretty clear you need some rest. So go. It’s okay. I can occupy myself until class starts.”

“Thanks for understanding, Iffy.”

Iffy smiled. When Brett smiled back, it was one of the most painful things Iffy had ever seen. But she forced herself not to frown. She couldn’t pry. Not while they were barely acquaintances.


	3. Chapter 3

The rest of Wednesday came and went, and the night passed, and, eventually, so did Thursday morning. Nate reaffirmed their get together for later that afternoon, but other than that, they didn’t have much chance to talk in class, as it was mostly lecture that day. They got out late, and Iffy had to rush to her next class without saying ‘goodbye.’ It ate at her for the next hour and a half of class: what if he thought she was blowing him off? What if he thought she was rude? What if he thought --

 _It doesn’t matter_ , she told herself. _If he’s worth my time, he’ll understand_.

He didn’t even mention it when they met again in the student union after both of their classes had ended, simply asked,

_Did you make it to your class in time?_

Iffy smiled. She nodded and handed the phone back.

Nate turned away and gestured for her to join him. She fell into step beside him, sort of, but he had such long legs she almost had to speed walk to keep up.

Nate signed something, but all she understood was ‘want’ and ‘signs.’

Iffy frowned. “Sorry, I only caught a little of that.”

Nate nodded, pulled his phone out of his pocket, and tapped in, _Want to learn some relevant signs?_

“Oh!” Iffy grinned. She handed the phone back. “Sure!”

Nate pocketed his phone and showed her each sign one at a time, fingerspelling it slowly, letter by letter, twice afterward so she could get it. Coffee, tea, cookie, milk, scone, chocolate, vanilla.

“How do you say raspberry?” Iffy asked. “Like, raspberry flavor?”

Nate showed her.

 _I like chocolate and raspberry in my coffee_ , she signed.

Nate grinned. He signed something and then fingerspelled ‘latte.’

 _I like chocolate and raspberry in my latte_ , she repeated.

He gave her a thumbs up and gently patted her shoulder. Iffy laughed and leaned a little closer.

* * *

The coffee shop was small, but not cramped, with high, open ceilings and floor to roof windows. All the furniture was dark green, wood and plush alike. An interesting choice. But it fit well with the vibe: laid-back, relaxed, with ‘70s punk playing from the speakers overhead. Right now it was The Clash: “Should I Stay or Should I Go?”

There were two men at the counter, and Iffy couldn’t help but feel outnumbered, because Nate slapped the hand of the one covered in tattoos and batted down the brim of the other one’s hat, so it was clear they all knew each other and she was the odd one out.

“And who’s this?” the hat one asked.

 _Butterfly,_ Nate signed.

“Iffy,” she said simultaneously.

The man looked over at her and said, “I’m Justin.” He thumbed over at the other man, who grinned and waved. “This is Blue. Which name do you prefer?”

Iffy opened her mouth, then hesitated. She didn’t want to be difficult or frustrating or annoying, and Nate had made up a name sign for her and everything. But Iffy was her _name_. It was hers, and not many things were, or had stayed so constantly over the years.

“Either is fine,” she said, but it was unsure and unenthusiastic.

“Butterfly, then?” Justin said. “So we’re all using the same name?” His eyes darted over her face, then he said, “Or I can call you Iffy and we can just use Butterfly as a name sign.”

Iffy paused, the relief visible in her shoulders. “I like the second one,” she finally said.

“Go ahead and order anything.”

Iffy furrowed her brow. What a weird thing to say. Justin’s eyes were on Nate, and he looked back at Iffy again as he pointed at his friend. “I’m translating,” he said.

Iffy chuckled. “Oh! Okay. I’m sure that’s easier than the phone thing we’ve been doing, yeah?” She looked up at Nate and he nodded and gave her a thumbs up.

He signed something else, but Justin didn’t translate. He signed back to Nate without speaking. Blue and Iffy shared a bemused look and Blue shrugged. Iffy chuckled again. Finally, Justin sighed, rolled his eyes, and said,

“He says I make the best coffee in the city, so anything’s good.”

Nate crossed his arms and nodded sagely and Iffy giggled, hiding her mouth with her hand. People always told her she laughed too loud when she was growing up. She didn’t want to offend anyone or look stupid.

Blue nudged Justin with his elbow and said, “No, he’s right. Your coffee is awesome, man. I’ve been to some good coffeehouses, but none do it as well as you do. Not even our other baristas.” He paused. “Please don’t tell them I said that.”

After Nate and Iffy got their drinks, they retired to the fluffy loveseat pushed up against the far wall. It was a comfortable as it looked, overstuffed and soft and it sucked Iffy in when she sat down. She laughed.

“I may need you to help me out of this,” she said. She reached over to the side table to put down the plastic tumbler Justin made her drink in, but her elbow couldn’t bend the right way over the arm rest and she just flailed a little instead. She bit her lip and looked down at her lap, settling back into the couch with her cup, ice cold in her hands, resting on her knees. The back of her neck burned hot with embarrassment.

Nate gently tapped her knee to get her attention back on him. She looked up, grateful her skin was dark enough that she’d never been obvious when she blushed. Nate was smiling at her, not a shred of judgment on his face, and he signed, _Coffee good?_

 _Delicious!_ Iffy replied. For a very short while, they shared stilted conversation in ASL, but they quickly ran out of things to say with Iffy’s limited vocabulary, so Nate pulled out his phone and they got into the conversation in earnest.

 _Tell me something about yourself I don’t know_.

It was a sharp turn from their small talk about how good the coffee was and what kind of cookies the café sold.

Iffy tapped her pursed lips and hummed softly in thought. “I remember saying in passing I’d go into professional dancing if there was a call for it. Did I ever tell you what I do? I don’t remember.”

Nate shook his head.

Iffy leaned forward and carefully placed her coffee by her foot. She counted off on her fingers as she listed the types of dance she’d been trained in.

“Well, I have training in ballet, ballroom, and Latin. But what got me into it in the first place was breakdancing. My friends, D and GerBear, taught me when we were all young. They’re a few years older than me.”

_That’s so cool! I wish I could dance. But I’m made of like, pool noodles and Muppets, so I always look ridiculous._

Iffy laughed so hard she snorted, and she stopped abruptly and slapped her hand over her mouth. Nate smiled. It was perfectly symmetrical, teeth and all.

_I like your laugh. Don’t hide it._

Iffy’s fingers tightened on the phone and she moved the hand over her mouth to brush her hair out of her eyes.

“Thank you,” she finally said. “It’s actually really ugly. But that’s sweet.”

Nate snatched the phone out of her hands.

_No! It’s happy and bright and enthusiastic and everything a laugh should be! So you snorted, who cares? It’s cute! And you can send anyone who says otherwise to me._

Iffy smiled at the kind words on the screen. Her parents had always said she laughed too loud, too brash for a girl, and it was unbecoming. It was only okay to be proud of certain things. Her laugh wasn’t one of them.

Nate tapped the last two words on the screen firmly and nodded at her once, hard. Finally, Iffy smiled, and Nate smiled back.

She handed the phone back and threw her arm over the couch, only too late realizing how _close_ that brought her to touching him. The back of his neck brushed against her skin, a little bony but still soft. Did the tattoo there mean anything? It was a hand, palm outward, with an eye in the center. What would it feel like to touch that skin in earnest, to run her fingers over it, to -- oh no. Oh, no. She couldn’t have a crush on him. She couldn’t have a crush on anyone! She had too many things to do -- school to attend and grades to keep up so she wouldn’t lose her scholarship, classes to teach over at the community center, and she had to make sure her friendships didn’t suffer for all the time she was going to be spending on those things -- and a potential romance would just gum everything up.

She nearly picked up her coffee and walked out the door with nothing but a simple ‘goodbye’ right there. The cup was in her hand. She’d come back without Nate to return it. Both feet were on the floor. She just had to move her arm away from his back and --

And when she opened her mouth to say _Thank you for the coffee, I have to go_ , Nate’s eyes brightened so _much_ just at the thought she was going to speak to him. A larger part of her wanted to learn more sign language and talk more about her dancing and his poetry, she wanted to stay and talk over a second cup of coffee, a third, and she wanted her arm to stay right where it was, behind Nate’s neck, brushing against his skin.

So instead of _Goodbye_ , she said, “Are you hungry?” It was dumb and stupid and lame because if he’d been hungry, he would have bought something with his coffee, but she blanked on every other question in her bank. “I’ll buy?” she offered.

Nate smiled but shook his head.

 _I’m fine_ , he signed

* * *

The conversation and coffee lasted for hours. It was about three hours, four cups of coffee, and a scone and muffin later that Nate asked, _Are you familiar with Food Not Bombs?_

Iffy tilted her hand back and forth in a ‘kind of’ motion and handed the phone back. Nate scratched his chin in thought, then went back to typing.

_It’s a group that focuses on food shortage and feeding the homeless. Our… mission statement is that there’s enough food to feed everyone, but there’s so much perfectly good stuff getting thrown away because it’s ugly, and more money is being spent on war than feeding the hungry. But half the group picks up donations and half the group dumpster dives and we get all the food together and serve in one of the parks nearby. Sometimes we do protests and events. Would you like to come with us one weekend?_

Iffy frowned in thought as she read Nate’s words. It sounded really cool, like a hobby she could feel proud of. That her parents might be proud of. They were always saying she wasn’t involved enough in the community.

But she couldn’t do this for her parents. If she was going to get involved in something like this, it had to be for _her_. Finally, her frown faded and she nodded.

“Sure,” she said. Nate took the phone back.

_Are you comfortable with dumpster diving or would you rather be on the donation team?_

“I am _fine_ with dumpster diving,” Iffy laughed. “Renee and Vi do a brunch with their feminist collective every Saturday, for the community, and that’s how they get their food. Sometimes I go with them. I always go to the brunch.”

Nate’s smile faltered. Iffy’s mouth turned down. “What’s wrong?”

_We serve on Saturday afternoons, so you might not be able to come._

“Hm,” Iffy said. She stroked her chin and took a sip of her dwindling coffee. “What time?”

 _1:30,_ Nate signed.

“The brunch is at 11:00 and usually lasts until noon,” Iffy said. “That should be fine, as long as your location is local?”

_We serve at the park by the auditorium._

“Okay, so I can take the bus there. I’ll have to transfer to get there from Vi’s house but even so I should --”

She paused when Nate nudged his tablet back into her hands. _I can give you a ride, too, if it helps. Only if you want, though! Otherwise you can meet us there._

Iffy paused and bit her lip.

_“Hey there! Do you need a ride? I was just coming out of the grocery store and saw you.”_

But Nate had a reason to offer her a ride. Renee and Vi would know where she was going and expect a text upon arrival, like they always did, for all three of them. He wasn’t some creep with a weird story trying to get her alone. He was her friend. Right?

Nate nudged the tablet against her knuckles again. She looked over from her hands.

_Did I make you uncomfortable? I’m so sorry. I just thought it might be easier for you._

And that made all the difference. Iffy smiled and said, “No, it’s okay. I’d love it if you could give me a ride.”

* * *

 

Iffy didn’t always go dumpster diving with Renee and Vi, and she didn’t that Friday, either. She was going to have a lot of homework to do over the weekend, and if she was going to be busy all day Saturday, she wouldn’t have enough time on Sunday to finish. She didn’t help cook later that night, either. But she was there, with Renee, bright and early at Vi’s door on Saturday morning. Vi’s parents were gracious enough to let them use the backyard, and right now Iffy could see the tops of brightly colored umbrellas poking out from behind the door leading into it. Mr. and Mrs. Karzai always let people come inside to the air conditioning if they got too hot, but, understandably, they were hesitant to invite a bunch of strangers inside their home. The door already had the sign taped on: _Brunch guests, please knock on the backyard door,_ with an arrow pointing in the right direction.

Vi pounced on Renee and Iffy when she opened the door, with a bright, “Good morning, my loves!” Instead of the bright violet hijab she wore to school, she was wearing a pastel lavender one, and a flowing pink dress over pale jeans. It was the most feminine Iffy had ever seen her dress.

“Your outfit is really pretty,” she said. “Any occasion?”

“Nope!” Vi laughed. “Just felt like being pretty.”

“You’re always pretty,” Renee grinned.

“Oh, shut up, you.” Vi planted a sloppy kiss on Renee’s mouth, then led them both inside.

The backup food was in the kitchen, but the main spread was set up in the backyard. It was only 11:00 a.m. and it was already too hot, even under the shade of the umbrellas.

The doorbell rang, and someone knocked on the back door, and volunteers and guests swarmed in with purpose, and the brunch began in earnest.

The time rushed by, and an hour passed, and by then most of the guests had cleared out, except for one woman and her two kids who were cooling off inside. Volunteers picked up plates and cups and napkins, but their guests were usually pretty clean, putting dishes in the labeled bins and throwing trash away.

Once everything was together, Renee grabbed the bin of dishes and propped it on her hip.

“Anything else?” she asked.

“Don’t think so!” Vi called back.

“Here, I’ll help you load up the dishwasher,” Iffy said. “Nate should be here any minute, but I can still help while I’m here.”

She’d barely gotten two plates in the dishwasher when the doorbell rang. Mrs. Karzai was hovering over the woman and her two children nervously, offering water and ice packs to make sure they cooled down properly, when Iffy made her way through the living room to open the door.

It _was_ Nate, with a bright grin and a wave.

 _Hi! How are you?_ Iffy signed. Nate’s grin brightened and his shoulders straightened from their usual lazy slump.

 _You’ve been practicing!_ he signed back. Iffy grinned.

 _Renee’s been tutoring me,_ Iffy said. _She’s --_

“Iffy!” Mrs. Karzai called. “Please either invite your friend in or go outside! You are letting all the cold air out!”

“Sorry, Mrs. Karzai!” Iffy called back. “Renee, Vi, I’m on my way! I’ll let you know when I get there!”

Iffy stepped out and shut the door behind her, and Nate tapped her shoulder to get her attention.

_You said your friend is tutoring you? Is she Deaf, or --“_

_She’s hearing,_ Iffy stumbled out. She didn’t know how to sign what she wanted to say next, so she said it aloud. “She’s not fluent, but she knows more than me, and when I told her you were teaching me, she offered to help.”

_Awesome!_

Iffy grinned. The sign even looked like a celebration.

They got into Nate’s car -- a beat up, old, blue Toyota -- and Nate grabbed his phone from the center console.

_I can’t sign and drive at the same time, so this trip is all about you! Talk about anything you want. I would love to listen. :)_

Iffy smiled, albeit a little nervously. She shrugged. “I don’t really know what to talk about.”

Nate shrugged one shoulder, but he’d already started the car and pulled out, so he couldn’t use his phone. He gestured to Iffy and nodded his chin up, then made a flourish with his hand, as if to say, _The world is yours!_

“Um,” she started awkwardly. “Well.” She cleared her throat. “I was thinking, since, you know, you invited me to coffee, and now we’re doing this, I thought, maybe I’d invite you somewhere to say thanks? But I didn’t know where, and I thought, well, maybe you could come to the Latin dance club with me and my old high school team?” There were other clubs around town, of course, hundreds, even, but she liked Sabor! because people just went there to dance, not to drink, not to flirt. Just dance. And everyone almost always came with a partner, so she didn’t have to worry if she was left alone by her friends.

Iffy looked away from the window and over at Nate for a reply: a smile, a shake of the head. He glanced over at her for just a moment and nodded out at the road. He shifted his hands and gave her a thumbs up.

“Awesome!” Iffy grinned. “We have plans for next Friday night, but if you can’t make it, we do go all the time, so --“

Nate gently poked her cheek with a soft ‘moop’ sound. Iffy blinked, and her smile softened. That was probably his way of saying it was okay?

“We can talk about it in more detail once you have your phone again,” she said. That should be safe.

Nate gave her another thumbs up and put his hands back on the wheel.

The drive was quiet, but pleasantly so. Iffy didn’t know what to say, but, for once, didn’t feel pressured into filling the silence. She smiled softly, and even though it was just for herself, she didn’t mind if Nate saw it, too.

It didn’t take long to get to the park. It was small and underfurnished, without even a ramada to block out the sun. There weren’t even any picnic tables! Nate parked and pulled out his tablet.

_I have umbrellas in the backseat and a table in the trunk. You up for helping me get them to the serve site?_

“Sure,” Iffy grinned, and they got out of the car.

Even though she knew it wasn’t, it felt rude to talk at Nate while his hands were full and he couldn’t talk back. He and Iffy split the umbrellas and would come back to get the table together.

There was one table there already, full of pots and pans and dishes of food, with a camp stove in the middle to heat things on. There was a young man there already, with two teenage girls. One of them, with rainbow streaked hair, shot out from behind the table and plowed into Nate with a squeaked, “Hi!” Nate shoved the umbrellas into her arms and his hands started going wild. Iffy looked on with confusion, completely lost. Obviously they knew each other, but from where?

She turned to Iffy and said, “I’m Joey. He’ll tell you I’m Squeaker but he lies. He’s saying I just saw him yesterday so I shouldn’t be so excited, but he’s the best big brother in the world, so of course I’m excited? I mean, duh? Who wouldn’t be?”

Iffy chuckled and leaned the umbrellas against the table. Joey followed suit.

“Anyway,” Joey said, “this is my friend Callie and her big brother Robin, or Binny, or whatever he wants today. It changes all the time.”

He laughed and shook Iffy’s hand. “Robin’s fine,” he said. He gestured out to the park, to the full benches and the people standing around and sitting on the ground. “As you can see, we’ve already started. The umbrellas will be really helpful so people don’t roast, so thank you.” He looked over Iffy’s head to where Nate had put Joey in a headlock and called, “We don’t need your table today. It looks like it’s just going to be us.”

Nate frowned and straightened up, letting Joey go. She adjusted her hair as he pulled his phone out and started tapping. Iffy was expecting it to be a response to what Robin had said, so she jumped when Nate stuck it in front of her face.

_We used to have almost ten people. Callie isn’t even a regular, my guess is she came along because Squeaker spent the night there last night. Sometimes Justin comes, but we can’t count on it because of his work schedule. We’ve been losing people left and right. That’s why I was so excited when you agreed to come. We need all the help we can get._

Iffy frowned at the tablet and looked up at Nate. “That really sucks,” she murmured. She paused. “You know, I’ll bet Vi and Renee would be interested. It’s tricky with the brunch, but if you don’t mind us being a little later, I could ask if the three of us could all come together after cleanup?”

Nate lit up and nodded his head with excitement.

_That would be fantastic! We could split the cooking up, then, because my kitchen can fit maybe four, but Robin and Callie live in a really tiny place with their parents and little brother, so honestly I don’t know how they got this out today._

Iffy chuckled and continued reading.

_Do you know of any good places we can cook?_

“Well,” Iffy said, “We used to use the kitchen at the community center in Phoenix before Renee and I moved out here. Then it was easier to just use Vi’s kitchen, since her house is so big and our brunch is so small. But I’ll bet they’d be open to letting you use it! I’ll help you set it up. I work there so I know everyone, so I can help you get through some of the red tape. I’ll ask next time I’m in.”

Nate laughed, big and open and exuberant, and grabbed Iffy in a hug that lifted her off her feet. She squealed in surprise and she grabbed at his sides as she laughed, too.

He smelled like vanilla and sandalwood, and his arms were firm and warm, and Iffy could easily get lost there all day.

That was when she knew: she was doomed. She had a crush.

* * *

 

It wasn’t until they were about to pack up that the last people started to arrive. A woman with two small children, who Iffy had seen almost every week at the brunch. She came here too? Apparently so.

Was it just because she liked the community, or did they really need the help?

The woman attempted to balance her plate, along with her two kids’, on her arms to make their way over to one of the umbrellas, so Iffy grabbed one of the plates and pulled some water from the cooler into the biggest cup they had, and helped them carry it over.

“Thank you,” the woman said with a grateful smile. They sat down on the side of the planter underneath one of the remaining umbrellas and Iffy said, “Do I recognize you from the brunch the Phoenix Feminist Collective serves every week?”

The woman flushed bright red and put her fork back on her plate, but her children continued to eat.

“I’m sorry,” she said softly. “I wasn’t expecting to see you here, too.”

Iffy sat down beside her and said, “What do you mean?”

“It’s embarrassing, you know? To have to ask for help all the time. Sometimes Saturday is the only day we can get more than one meal.”

“Are you homeless?” Iffy asked gently.

“We’re staying at a shelter,” the woman said. “But we can only be there to sleep, basically. The kids are at school during the week while I look for better work, so it’s not quite so hard, but weekends are a lot harder. You know?”

“I’m Iffy, by the way.” Iffy pushed her hair behind her ear and continued. “Sorry. That was rude.”

“It’s fine,” the woman laughed. “I’m Hannah, and these are my sons, Peter and Michael.” She looked down at her kids. “Say hello, boys!”

They both waved, but continued to shovel food into their mouths. Iffy’s mouth pulled down, just a little.

“Do you have a place where you can store food that has to be kept cold?” she asked.

“No,” Hannah smiled sadly. “We eat a lot of hamburger buns. They’re cheap.”

Iffy’s frown deepened. She gently put her hand on Hannah’s arm and said, “Don’t leave until I come back, okay?”

Hannah’s brow furrowed. “Sure,” she said, and Iffy stood, and Hannah went back to her food.

Iffy approached the table, where Robin and Nate were packing everything up. “Wait,” she said. “Don’t put it all away yet. We have some people who might need more.”

“Oh! Oh, sorry,” Robin said. “I thought everyone had gotten food already. Sorry. We’ll put it all back out.”

“I think they did, but there’s a single mom out there with two kids, and they might need more. Do we have anything shelf stable that we can send with her?”

Nate frowned in thought and tapped his chin, then held up one finger and dove back into the back of the van. He dug around a bit, then re-emerged with a jar of peanut butter and two loaves of bread. He handed them to Iffy and dug out his phone from his bookbag on the table.

_It’s boring, but at least it’s calorie heavy, and there’s protein in the peanut butter. It’s all we’ve got that doesn’t eventually need refrigeration, but we can look around more on our next trip for things that might fit what she needs._

Iffy looked down at the bread. Cinnamon raisin and sourdough.

She took them back to Hannah and placed them on the planter beside her.

“It’s not much, but at least it’s some variety from hamburger buns, and the peanut butter has protein.”

Hannah’s hands flew to her mouth and she said, “I couldn’t, this is for everyone, I couldn’t take it just for me --”

“It’s okay,” Iffy said gently. “It’s extra, we weren’t going to serve it, anyway. So don’t worry about that. And it’s not just for you, it’s for your boys, too.”

Hannah still looked hesitant, then Peter asked, “Mom, can I go get some more?”

Hannah looked up at Iffy. Iffy grinned. “Of course, kiddo. Get as much as you like.”

“Thank you!” he piped, popping to his feet and heading over to the table.

“Me, too, Mom?” Michael asked.

“Get as much as you want,” Hannah said.

“Thanks, Mom!” He ran over to join his brother.

Iffy dropped her voice and said, “Please. There’s plenty more where that came from. Please take it.”

Hannah’s eyes were starting to water, and she nodded.

“Thank you so much,” she said.

She threw her arms around Iffy’s shoulders. Iffy was still a moment, taken aback, but then she hugged Hannah back and said, “There will be more next week, too, okay?”

“Thank you,” Hannah sobbed. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

If there was all this over two loaves of bread and a jar of peanut butter, their situation was probably a lot more serious than Hannah let on. But Iffy couldn’t force her to talk. Some people were proud, or embarrassed, or humiliated at their situation.

Iffy promised herself then and there that she’d come out with Nate every week, and make a point to look out for Hannah and her sons at the brunches, too.

After everyone had been fed and the food put away, the group planned to meet at the library to wrap up and have their weekly meeting. Squeaker went with Callie so Nate could take the food in the backseat and swing by his house to drop it off before meeting them at the library.

They pulled up in front of a good-sized one story house made of brick, with pretty desert plants poking up here and there out of the gravel front yard. Iffy looked over at Nate and asked, “Why are we stopping here?”

Nate laughed, a bright, barking thing, and pulled out his tablet. _I live here_.

Iffy’s eyes widened and she slapped her hand over her mouth. She slowly lowered it and whispered, “Really?”

Nate grinned.

“Are you… are you rich?”

Nate laughed again. _Not by a long shot. Comfortable, but not rich. We flipped it a few years ago. We did most of the work ourselves. We even had to redo a lot of the wiring. We hired someone for that, though._

“So you and Justin have been living here that whole time, huh?”

Nate grinned again and nodded. _Come on, let’s get this food inside before it gets too hot out._

* * *

 

It didn’t take long to find space for everything. There wasn’t much left, mostly little bits of this and that that they were able to move into smaller containers. Iffy started to wash the dishes, but Nate gently took her wrist and tugged her away while he shook his head.

“But, the dishes --!”

Nate made a dismissive sort of ‘ch!’ sound and waved it away with his free hand. He dropped Iffy’s wrist and pulled his phone out of his pocket.

_Don’t worry about it. I can do this when I get home._

“But, are you sure? That’s not fair, I can --”

Nate tapped the first sentence again. _Don’t worry about it._

Iffy looked over her shoulder back to the kitchen, the bowls and pots and serving utensils and plates and cups.

“I guess we do have to get to the library, but…”

 _Exactly_ , Nate signed.

“Okay,” Iffy finally conceded. “But if it’s not too out of the way, I’ll come back with you and help, okay?”

_Only if you want to?_

Iffy smiled. _I want to,_ she signed back.

_You’re getting better!_

Her smile widened into a grin.

_Thank you._


	4. Chapter 4

The next few days went by uneventfully. There was homework, and schoolwork, and the occasional essay, and there was a lot of it, but Iffy supposed she could expect that from honors classes. Iffy spent most afternoons after class at the coffee shop with Nate -- on purpose, this time, no accidental meetups -- and while a lot of that time, they just did homework while sitting next to each other, it was nice to be so near him.

Then, on Tuesday, over homework and coffee, Nate slid his Blackberry under her nose.

_So, remember how you asked me to go dancing with you? If you were serious about that, there’s something you should know. I can’t dance. Remember pool noodles and Muppets?_

Iffy looked up with a wry smile. “Of course I was serious,” she said. She paused. “And, well, I can’t teach you everything by the time we go out, but I can bring you up to passable.”

_Thank you so much!_

Iffy wasn’t sure whether that was sarcasm or not, so she didn’t comment.

* * *

 

Nate knocked on Iffy’s door. He’d gotten turned around a few times in the large apartment complex, but finally found her place after about five minutes.

When he’d asked her to teach him to dance yesterday, he wasn’t sure she’d agree -- she was so busy, after all -- but when she did, he could have danced -- horribly -- right there in the coffee shop.

He didn’t have time to make cookies, but he picked up a tray of brownies from the store, and while he was there, he saw the most beautiful sunflowers, so he grabbed one of those, too.

Iffy opened the door and grinned when she saw him. “Nate, hi! I’m glad you’re here! My roommate is going to sit in on us, is that okay?”

Nate nodded, then shoved the brownies and the sunflower awkwardly into Iffy’s hands. _So, I really like you a lot, like, more than friends,_ he signed quickly. _And it’d be an honor if you’d let me take you out on a date?_

Iffy just stared at him blankly. Her brow furrowed.

“I only got half of that,” she said slowly. “You’re… glad we’re friends?”

Nate held up a finger and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He repeated the message in text and handed it over. His face was flushed dark and hot. What if she said no? Would she not want to be his friend? Would she think he was her friend _only_ so he could try to date her? Nate didn’t know which was worse.

Her fingers loosened on the gifts and she fumbled, but caught them. Her skin flushed warm and dark and she cleared her throat, averting her eyes to his shoe, which suddenly seemed very interesting. He slipped the phone under her nose again.

 _Please don’t feel pressured. Of course we can still be just friends if you want. I won’t bring it up again_.

“No,” Iffy said, “I mean, no, not no, I mean, shit.” She cleared her throat and looked up to Nate’s face, but didn’t quite meet his eyes. “I mean, no, I’m not pressured. I like you a lot, too. And a date would be… a date would be nice.”

_Like dinner? Or a poetry slam?_

“Or dancing?” Iffy asked, hesitant and stilted, looking up from the phone.

Nate grinned.

“Here, um, why don’t you come in and we can talk about it in the air conditioning and I can find a place to put these.”

Iffy took a few steps backward and looked to her right. “Renee!” she called. “I need you to disappear for a few minutes!”

As Nate pushed the door open to enter, he caught a glimpse of a head of red hair entering one of the bedrooms. “You got it!” she called.

“You’ll meet her in a minute,” Iffy said, “since you didn’t get the chance on Saturday.”

Nate nodded and grinned. Iffy finally smiled and turned around to put the brownies on the counter. Then, of all things, she grabbed her blender and started filling it with water. She stuck the sunflower in, and when she saw the alarm on Nate’s face when she turned back around, she assured him, “We use the blender for flowers because we don’t have a vase.”

 _Oh!_ He made a mental note to bring a vase the next time he brought flowers. Maybe. The blender _would_ make a cute story. Iffy turned back to the brownies and popped the plastic lid off, cutting out three squares. She put one to the side for Renee, handed one to Nate, and took one for herself.

“Sit down with me?” she said.

Nate followed Iffy to the couch and sat down beside her.

“What if,” Iffy started. She paused and cleared her throat. “What if the dance club this Friday was a date?”

_I’d love to take you out to dinner beforehand, if you want._

Iffy looked up from the phone with a small grin. “I’d like that. What’s that place Brett told me about… Pita’s Jungle?”

_Pita Jungle._

“Yeah! What if we went there? As long as it’s not too far out of the way.”

_We’ll look up locations at some point today?_

“That sounds good,” Iffy smiled. “But I need to know, is this just a single date?”

Nate rubbed the back of his neck and cleared his throat. He took the phone back and typed, _Well, I’d like it to be multiple dates, and then eventually, maybe, if you decide you’re not sick of me, a relationship?_

Iffy took the Blackberry and her smile grew wider and wider as she read the words on it. She grinned up at Nate and said, “I don’t think I could ever get sick of you.”

She took a small bite of her brownie and placed it on the end table next to the couch. Once she’d finished chewing, she called out, “Renee! Come on out and meet Nate!”

Renee peeked out of her bedroom and grinned. She entered the living room and made a beeline for Nate, towering over even him, as he was sitting down. She propped her fists on each hip and cocked her head to the side, then looked at Iffy and said, “So, this is your cute friend who you’re totally not dating?”

Iffy’s face flushed hot and she curled her fingers up near her mouth. “Well, you know, that was then, this is now.”

Renee barked in laughter and grinned, holding her hand out for Nate to shake. He took it. Both of them had strong handshakes, and they stared each other in the eye a moment, sizing one another up. They smiled at each other, and Renee said, “As long as you treat her right and make her happy, Nate. That’s all that matters to me.”

Nate nodded.

“She’s learning ASL for you, Nate,” Renee continued. “She is _learning another language_ for you _._ You’ve known each other a week and a half. You do realize what a big deal that is, right?”

Nate’s smile softened and he dropped his hand, looking back at Iffy. She looked back at him, and he gently hooked her hair behind her ear. Iffy smiled.

He looked back at Renee and nodded.

“Just making sure.” Renee signed as she spoke, now that she had both hands.

Nate’s smile widened. _Are you the friend teaching her sign language?_

“Well, me and Vi,” Renee laughed. “It’s a joint effort. She’s a slow learner.”

“Hey!” Iffy pouted, propping her hands on her hips. “I’m working really hard, okay?”

_I know. And I appreciate it so much._

It was the shortest message Nate had ever written to her, but one of the most meaningful. She smiled and leaned against his shoulder, looking up at him and whispering, “I’m glad.”

She looked up at Renee as she handed Nate his tablet. “There’s a brownie for you on the counter.”

Renee lit up. “Really? Sweet!”

She skipped over to the kitchen as Iffy stood and offered her hand. “We’re going to start with cha-cha, because the basic steps are simplest.”

Nate put his tablet on the table on his side of the couch and took Iffy’s hand as he pushed himself up. Iffy let him go and pressed the play button on the boom box in the corner. She shook out her arms and legs and stretched her neck a few times, then put her arms out as if she were holding someone and said, “Like this. Two steps forward, cha-cha-cha, two steps backward, cha-cha-cha.” She moved her feet with her instructions, staying on her toes, which were covered in blue and green striped socks. Nate pointed at them, then winked at Iffy and gave her a thumbs up. _I like your socks._

“Thank you,” Iffy said, “but pay attention.”

“They _are_ cute socks,” Renee said as she came back into the living room and plopped on the couch. Iffy rolled her eyes.

“Okay, so, the whole point of Latin dance styles,” Iffy started, “according to my instructor of many, many years, anyway, is for the person leading to make the person following shine. You, Nate, are going to lead, because you are the taller one by a long shot, so your job is basically to make me look pretty.”

 _That won’t be a problem,_ Nate signed. Renee translated it and both he and Iffy flushed hot.

“I wasn’t supposed to translate that,” Renee translated his next signs cheerfully. Nate groaned and covered his face with his hand. “That either, apparently.” She took a bite of her brownie and grinned.

“Well, um,” Iffy squeaked. “Thank you, Nate. That’s very flattering. But, what I mean is, you’re supposed to show me off, like a flower, or a --”

 _A butterfly?_ Nate asked. Iffy grinned. Nobody had taught it to her, but it was so similar to her name sign, she understood immediately.

 _Or a butterfly_ , she signed back.

“That means ‘butterfly,’” Renee translated helpfully.

Nate covered his chuckle with a loosely curled hand, and Iffy rolled her eyes, but smiled.

“Thank you, Renee.”

“Welcome.” Renee took another bite of her brownie, quieting herself for a few moments.

Iffy brushed her hair away from her face and continued. “So, the steps are incidental for a lot of the dances. We’re not competing, so it doesn’t matter if you miss one or if you’re sloppy. So --” she opened and closed her hand a few times -- “dance with me.”

* * *

 

Friday couldn’t come fast enough. Iffy was vibrating in excitement and nerves when she woke up that morning, way too early to be reasonable. But GerBear and D were often online at weird times, so she logged on to see.

D was on, so she sent him a message.

 

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Hey, there! You’re still coming out tonight, right?

 **SexyEwok22** : OF COURSE

 **SexyEwok22** : you bringing a date?

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : :)

 **SexyEwok22** : WHOOHOO!!!!

 **SexyEwok22** : you decide to go for a natural hairstyle yet?

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Sigh. No, still perming. GerBear, you know I can’t, with my job.

 **SexyEwok22** : how is your job going?

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Uneventful. But it might come in good for something! I might be able to use my connections to let my friend use the kitchens for his Food Not Bombs group.

 **SexyEwok22** : are you involved, too?

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Sort of? Just a little right now, going when I can, no commitment.

 **SexyEwok22** : ok just be careful if any cops show up

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : I know, I know. My parents have given me the talk multiple times. They were Panthers! They met doing the free breakfast program, remember? It’s in my blood.

 **SexyEwok22** : oup, gerbear is up, do you want me to get him online

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : If it’s no trouble.

 **SexyEwok22** : I literally just have to poke him, we share a room

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : I meant for him, you doof.

 

_UGotPorn has joined your chat._

 

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : Hey, GerBear! You’re coming to our dance outing tonight too, right?

 **UGotPorn** : UM YES

 **SexyEwok22** : I already said yes iffy what the hell

 **SexyEwok22** : and when are we not attached at the hip?

 **UGotPorn** : You bringing a date?

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : :)

 **SexyEwok22** : that’s what she said to me!! that’s a yes, right??

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : That’s a yes.

 **UGotPorn** : Are they a date or a partner?

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : HE is a date.

 **UGotPorn** : Well, you’re bi, we can’t just assume these things.

 **Bobette_the_Lizard_Queen** : I know, thank you. <3

 

Iffy chatted with the twins for a long while, mostly about dance clubs and music, swapping music files and links to new things while she waited for the time to pass. About an hour later, she logged off to make coffee, and as she stood, leaning against the counter and sipping at the cup while she looked at all the old show flyers on the fridge, she thought about life, and the universe, and everything, and whether The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy BBC Miniseries would ever be released officially to DVD in her region.

* * *

Nate threw another shirt over his shoulder. No good. He owned so many clothes. Why weren’t any of them suitable for a nice night out? Iffy had said it was a nice-ish place, a dance club, not a nightclub, and he had to dress accordingly or the bouncer might not let them in.

Justin poked his head into Nate’s room and asked, “You okay? I haven’t seen you in a while.”

 _I don’t have anything to wear!_ Nate signed. His hands flailed wildly and he buried his face in them once they finally stilled.

He looked up when Justin patted his shoulder and said, “Let me have a look.”

Nate sat down on his bed, worrying his nails between his teeth for just a moment before realizing it would ruin the nail polish he’d meticulously applied that morning. He put his hands in his lap instead. While Justin went through his walk-in closet, Nate sat back out of the way. Justin didn’t have the best fashion sense either. Maybe he should text Brett? Brett was good at these things.

Justin sorted through Nate’s clothes, calling out occasional comments such as “Why do you have so many denim jackets?” and “You probably have every pair of jeans that exist to fit your height.”

“You have too many clothes!” Justin laughed. But he straightened and turned around, holding a pair of slacks and a white dress shirt. He dropped them in Nate’s lap as he walked by and said, “I’ll get you one of my ties. Green okay?”

Nate nodded. _Okay_.

Justin started to walk away and Nate caught his wrist.

_Actually, do you have red? Red looks better on me._

“I’ll look,” Justin said. “I think so.”

Nate stood and shut the door behind his friend so he could get changed.

* * *

 

Iffy couldn’t stop pacing.

Her red and black dress had been carefully picked to hide the few parts of her body she wasn’t comfortable with. Her hair was pulled back in a tight bun with a little red flower. And Renee and Vi were watching her climb the walls over a date.

“Iffy, it’s okay,” Renee said. “He seems really sweet. I don’t think you have anything to worry about.”

“I don’t, either,” Iffy said.

“So why are you pacing?” Vi asked.

Iffy whirled toward her friends and cried, “What if he doesn’t like me?”

Renee and Vi shared a confused look.

“Um, Iffy,” Renee said, “he asked you out on a date and said he’d like it to be a permanent arrangement if you’re okay with that. I’m pretty sure he likes you.”

“But what if he changes his mind?” Iffy asked.

“I don’t think he will,” Vi said. “And if he does, I’ll punch him.”

Iffy’s shoulders relaxed a little and she finally laughed. “I’d rather you didn’t,” she said. “But thanks for the thought.”

Vi opened her mouth to respond, but a knock came on the door and interrupted her.

“All right,” Iffy said. She smoothed down her dress and looked at her friends. “Do I look okay?”

Renee clicked her tongue and gave her double finger guns. Vi laughed.

“You look beautiful,” Vi said, “and from what you told us, I don’t think he’d care even if you didn’t.”

Iffy smiled. Another knock.

When she opened the door, Nate was on the other side.

“We match,” was the first thing she said. Nate looked down at Iffy’s dress and looked back up with a grin. He handed her a small bouquet of six roses and showed her his cell phone with a pre-written message.

_For your blender._

Iffy laughed and said, “Come in while I get these settled, then we’ll get going.”

* * *

 

Sabor! was the same as it had always been: bright, loud, and beautiful. When they got there, Nate started to lead her into the entry line, but Iffy stopped him.

“Wait,” she said. “Some of my friends are already in there, but GerBear and D are still on their way. I want to wait for them.”

Nate nodded and led her to the side of the building that faced the parking lot. _They’re driving?_ he asked.

“Yeah,” Iffy said.

Nate pulled out his phone, but before he had a chance to write anything, Iffy jumped up and waved and called, “GerBear! D!”

She tapped Nate’s shoulder where he sat beside her and he slid his tablet back into his bookbag. He stood, towering over all three of them, as GerBear and D tackled her in a three-way hug.

“Iffy!” they both cried.

“Hi, guys!” she laughed. She disentangled herself from them and took Nate’s hand. Nate beamed. “This is Nate.” She turned to Nate and gestured toward the twins. “The one with the dreads is GerBear, the one with the afro is D. Since they’re twins and they do that annoying thing where they dress alike, that’s the easiest way to remember. I’ll…” she trailed off.

“You’ll…?” D asked.

“Shush,” she said, putting her hand over his mouth. He licked it. “Eww!” she cried, wiping it off on his shirt. D laughed.

“I’m talking to Nate, anyway,” she said. She turned to him and nervously, lightly took his hands.

“I’ll probably dance with each of them before the night is over, and maybe my other friends, too. It’s tradition in our little group, to swap partners around and dance with everyone. So… so don’t get jealous, okay?”

Nate’s face softened. He booped her nose with a soft little squeak, and she smiled. He smiled back and signed, _No jealousy here. They’re you’re friends. Of course you would want to dance with them._

Iffy didn’t understand all of it, but she understood enough. Her smile widened into a comfortable grin and she nodded, just once. Her step was lighter when she turned back around to the twins, and she said, “Well, let’s go!”

When they got inside, D grabbed GerBear’s hand and dragged him off while calling over his shoulder, “We’re going to go request a song!”

Nate stood against the wall a little awkwardly, playing with his hands. Iffy stood beside him, arms bumping. Wordlessly, Iffy wove her hands around Nate’s wrist and gently tugged his hands apart, winding her fingers with his.

Then GerBear and D’s song started. It had to have been them. It was their song. The team’s song. The song they danced to when they won their first competition.

Shakira’s “Te Aviso Te Anuncio.” The tango. Iffy’s favorite style.

Nate grinned. He recognized this style, even if he didn’t know the song, and he led Iffy out onto the dance floor. He was a little clumsy and awkward, because Iffy had only been able to give him the single three hour lesson before they came.

And so they danced -- one, two, three, four, one, two, three, four, spin, dip, three, four. Iffy had expected it to be more awkward with the height difference, but it wasn’t at all. They flowed together perfectly, fluidly, loosely joined by their hands clasped together and Nate’s hand on Iffy’s waist, Iffy’s on his arm. He had a lot to learn, but for a beginner, he was excellent.

It didn’t matter to Iffy that she’d had more talented dance partners, because dancing wasn’t about talent, not really -- it was about emotion and wordless communication.

Some people could tell all they needed to about someone through body language or the way they talked. Iffy couldn’t, but she could read anything through the way a person danced.

She wasn’t nervous about Nate anymore. She wasn’t afraid of his intentions and she wasn’t unnerved about what he might want out of her. He was sincere. He cared, honestly and completely. He didn’t want anything from her she wasn’t willing to give.

He’d said it before, and Iffy didn’t think he was lying, but dancing with him for so long -- the tango, the rumba, the cha cha, the Paso Doble, the samba and the salsa -- for _hours_ … it drove the point home.

* * *

 

While heels were perfect for dancing, they weren’t so good for Iffy’s arches, and Nate noticed her slowing down.

 _Is there re-entry here?_ he used his phone to ask.

“Yeah.”

He deleted his message and wrote a new one. _Do you want to go outside for a while? Get some fresh air and sit down?_

Iffy grinned. “You read my mind, Nate.”

_We can come back in after you’ve rested and you can dance with your friends then, maybe?_

“Perfect.”

Even though it was August, it was comfortably warm, not too hot, because it had already been dark for long enough to cool down the pavement. A comfortable breeze ruffled through Iffy’s hair. She started when she saw Nate’s hand near her face, but when she turned toward him, she realized he was just rearranging the flower that had gone lopsided in her hair. His hand hesitated, then he gently ran his fingers down her cheek, and when she leaned into it, he smiled. It came to rest comfortably on her shoulder. Just that gentle touch warmed her all the way through. She sighed when he pulled his hand away so he could dig his tablet out of his bag.

 _Thank you for inviting me out tonight_.

“I’m glad you came.”

 _Me, too._ He looked up at the sky and leaned back on the brick wall. The music seeped through the cracks, bass and drums.

The moon was full, even though they couldn’t see the stars through the light pollution. _Care to go on a moonlit walk with me?_ He smiled hopefully.

“I’d love to. How about… that way?” Iffy nodded to the left. Nate nodded.

As they walked, Nate tapped away on his phone, and finally pulled Iffy to a stop so she could read it without tripping.

_When you’re outside on a night like this, and it’s warm and the moon is full, when you look up at the sky, what do you think about?_

They stood there on the corner, face to face on of Nate’s hands just barely hovering above Iffy’s side as he held his phone with the other. Iffy took the hand by her side and pressed it into her dress, holding it there, softly.

Finally, Iffy answered. “I think …I think about how great it would be to find a lake somewhere and go swimming with my best friend. I think about playing tag in a huge field with nothing but the moon and stars lighting my way. I look at the stars and I wonder what each of them is thinking as they all look back down at me.” She reached up for one of the stars sitting just higher than the moon, then slowly closed her hand. She looked back up at Nate, and said, “And I think about what it would be like to catch a star, and hide it away in a little box, to save in secret until I fall in love.”

Maybe it was inappropriate to say on a first date. They’d only known each other, what, two weeks? Nate might even think she wasn’t talking about him.

But on nights like this, when the moon shone so brightly and a few stars peeked through the light pollution, it was easier to be honest.

The two stood in silence for a while, and eventually they leaned against the wall, Iffy’s head on Nate’s arm and his arm around her waist. After a long, long while, Nate tugged his hand away and Iffy looked up, waiting for him to sign or write her a message.

It was a message. _I have something for you, too. Not as nice as whoever’s lucky enough to get that star, but I thought of you when I saw it, and that’s the best kind of gift, I think._

Iffy looked up to see Nate worrying a small cardboard box between his hands.

“What’s this?” Iffy asked, returning Nate’s phone in exchange for the box. Nate held the phone close to his chest, watching anxiously as Iffy opened the small package.

Inside was a pair of blue and purple iridescent butterfly earrings, with little amethysts at the top where they went into the piercing. Iffy’s hand shot to her mouth and she gasped. She’d gotten thoughtful gifts in the past, from her friends, but never anything so beautiful. Especially not from a partner.

“I love them,” she whispered. “Thank you.”

The worry left Nate’s face and shoulders and he perked up. He typed something more into his phone and handed it over to Iffy.

_I know we’re not even through the first date, and you can say no, and I don’t want to pressure you, and it might not be ‘proper,’ but can I kiss you?_

Iffy laughed and pulled him down by his tie, playfully, so much more bold than she had been up to now. But the music and the moonlight had gone to her head, and she whispered, “Absolutely no pressure at all.”

Nate laughed against her mouth and softly, gently pressed his lips to hers. They stayed that way, neither moving to deepen it. A perfect interlude in a perfect night.

 

**The End**


End file.
